Post School Freak Outs

Hello!

So it's been a while since we last had a bit of a chat and I found that I needed to vent about the stresses of leaving your final year of high school. Now don't get me wrong leaving school not really the problem because I honestly couldn't be more excited about getting out of that nightmare, but really I'm thinking of all the stresses that are caused afterwards. For me I was tackled by the looming darkness of the overall positions and university offers. I dragged myself down on the thought of what would happen if I didn't get the marks that I needed or wasn't offered an invitation to attend my number one university. I would end up on the floor in a heap of crippling possibilities that weighed me down. I just couldn't handle all the feels that I was bombarded with, which really became a problem. 

Now last weekend I begrudgingly stayed up until 12am to sneak a peak at my overall position. For those of you who aren't Australian (specially Queensland), your overall position or OP is graded from 1-25 (1 being the best, 25 the worst) and is purely based on academic capabilities and potential. It is also how universities decide on who is smart enough for particular courses (ie. medical courses only accept students who receive an OP 1, etc). For my university I needed to receive an OP 11 to even be considered being an applicant. With bitten lips and half a head of hair I discovered that I had gratefully received an OP that allows me into my preferred course. 

My advice for anyone who thinks they are going to go to university after school is to not worry as much as I did. It's not worth the bother as there are so many other paths that you can take to get into the courses you want to study. Funnily enough people don't tell you this earlier on (surprise, surprise for being kept in the dark all the way to the end) and hence the stressing commences as you think its your one and only way in. Even if your not off to university it can be just as stressful jumping straight into full time employment but I can guarantee that eventually things do tend to work themselves out with a bit of effort.

Until next time! xx

Holiday Highlights!

Hello again!

As you may know I've recently graduated from high school (sorry to keep bringing it up) and to celebrate I spent months planning an incredible three week getaway for myself.  Mid way through November I enlisted my incredible older sister to join me in my travels and together we jumped on the first flight out of my small hometown and headed for the big city of Melbourne. With flashy restaurants, breath taking sights, copious shopping facilities and bright lights it definitely had us wowed! We visited the zoo, chapel street mall, the queen vic markets and more all the while eating like queens and having an amazing time. Unfortunately the time came for us to leave however we vowed to come back as soon as possible. To follow on week 2 consisted of visiting my grandparents and my auntie in Toowoomba and spending some quality time getting fed an unhealthy amount of waffles and ice-cream! The final stage of my trip involved the wonderful town of Noosa that resides along the Australian Coast. With beach filled mornings and a luxurious house (including a king sized bed to have an afternoon nap in) I was relaxed and loving it. So now that I've returned I couldn't wait to share some snaps of the highlights!

Some yummy sushi from a cute little japanese restaurant on chapel street.

I made one of the cutest little friends in Melbourne Zoo! Ins't he adorable!

The view that I had from my room in the city!

 Me and my cousin reading on the beach in Noosa!

 The most amazing peanut butter hot chocolate from San Churro!

 Chocolate feast that my sister and I shared!

This is a cake can you believe it!?

 Incredible sweets in the craziest little cafe!

 Look at all the macrons!

 A selfie with my little butterfly!

 The best lamb sandwich, fries, and soft shell crab ever!

My sister sporting a lovely blue butterfly fascinator!

And my ticket to see King Kong in the theatre (i may have cried a bit)!

Until next time! xx

New Swimwear!

Hello!

For the past few months I've been searching relentlessly for a new pair of togs this summer. Now I think every girl understands how difficult it is buying a new pair of togs, so you can understand when I say I was having so much trouble! I looked everywhere I possibly could, yet only found the perfect pair to wear today! 

It got me thinking about how much us girls really try to pick out the perfect pair of swimmers for the summer. I mean if we're going to spend our money on them we want them to be right. For me I have a little checklist that I think is essential depending on what I was looking for and it looked  a bit like this:

- must be a bikini

-bottoms preferably have string tie sides

-yet still be able to cover my large bottom

- they can't be too busy

-keep it pretty plain in colour but not plain in style

-must must must be good quality (they do have to last me the summer)

-can't be too expensive

-and must be found before I go on holiday on Nov 19

This made my job a little tricky but i personally think 5 of those items on the checklist were essential if I was to by them. I'm not a slim girl I've definitely got some curves and that makes bikinis a task. I can't be having any skimpy cheeky bottoms or else I'll be facing the consequences of the togs making my bum look bigger (which is not needed!) and ride up into my "bum crack"(for lack of a better expression)!

These are the togs I found in the end (sorry for using the website pictures but I don't have a camera at the moment) yet I do have different colours.

(I got the black and white version)

The bikini top covers my chest so I don't feel too exposed and I don't have to worry about my top falling off in the waves because it's very study on. Luckily it doesn't flatten my boobs and it has keep the back very open and minimal which appears very flatting on my body type and seems to be in style this swim season.

(I got the black version)

The bottoms whilst a plain colour are so funky as they have those little mesh peek-a-boo holes in the front panel. I loved how they had the tie up sides yet still had a decent amount of fabric left to cover up my booty appropriately! They don't look at all saggy which can be a bit of a problem with string tie bottoms and the rise is high enough that I don't feel uncomfortable either!

If you'd like to go go check out these togs or any of Seafolly's swimwear, click here!

Until next time! xx

Turning Over A New Leaf

Hello!

 Last night I received my QUT acceptance of appliance letter or whatever the hell it was. Now whilst that's so bloody exciting from my point of view I realise you're all probably thinking what the hell do you really think we're interested in that. Never fear though as it was a writing book and short message in said book that I wanted to bring to your attention.

The message reads:

The next chapter of your life's a blank page. What you write is up to you.....

etc,etc,etc

Isn't that cute though!?

In short it's left me a small book with completely blank pages and asks for me to fill it with whatever I wish, whether that be goals, aspirations, likes, or ideals, the list is endless. 

And whist it's cuteness is admirable it made me think that a lot of people are held back by their past. I know that it's happened to me before and I think of how my past is going to affect me and drag me down, so I tried to hide it. Luckily I've turned over that stone and have started to accept that yes I have a past but it's not baggage and my past isn't who I want to be nor is it who I am now. This book reminded me of this thought and I wanted to utilise it and take note from it. I've decided not to let my past define my future, everyday is a new page meaning no grudges are to be hold, no problems that hassled me yesterday will persist and no judgements on myself or others regarding who they used to be. 

I hope together we can all turn over a new page in our little heads and hearts.

Until next time! xx

Living in the now!

Hello!

Today is another revelation discovered by yours truly. I can't even begin to imagine what the hell I'm going to be like in 5, 10, 20 years time; where i'll be, who will be important in my life, or even what I'll be doing with myself. And it used to bother me terribly! That little exercise schools do sometimes where they get you to write down exactly this on a piece of paper or speak it aloud caused me PHYSICAL PAIN because I just I found it impossible to answer, like come on who do you think I am, the Doctor? And whilst I do realise that the resemblance is uncanny I can't travel to the year 2023 to grab a glimpse, I'm terribly sorry.

However looking back on my past I can see that there has been significant chances and the decisions I've made along the way and the things I aspired to be at the time affected how I acted and who I was. Throughout primary school for example I knew undoubtedly that I was going to be a star when I grew up. So I joined choir, stage band, wakakirri (which is an Aussie storytelling competition), and was in spectaculars and musicals up until I left. It made me outgoing and enjoyable because I was loving what I was doing and I was headed in the right direction for where I wanted to be at that point in my life. Just like in primary school, my decisions in early high school changed my personality dramatically however it was much for the worse, but as a shitty 14 year old girl what else was there to expect. Wishing to stay in with the 'cool' crowd at the time I stopped all the things I loved doing (aka performing) and signed myself up for things I despised (aka sports, and I don't use the word despise lightly). It made me crabby and irritable simply because I hated the decision I'd made, turns out I didn't even like the popular kids, they were constantly bitching and were never supportive of whatever anyone tried to do (except for possibly cheerleading). But it just didn't work out well for me, I'd lost all ambition at the time and when I got really sick (for a 3 month period) I felt grateful in a way for the time I got to get away from them and distance myself so that when I came back I could join in with a new crowd.

These choices I have made so far have directed me on my path and although I can see that some obvious changes have been made, and that I've been able to grow and come to these kind of realisations there is still no possible way I can predict what is going to motivate me, not even in the near future like next month or tomorrow! So my main message here is that you HAVE to live your life in the moment literally, sure take onboard past decisions and learn from the mistakes you've made but don't go planning out what lies ahead because I can guarantee that you'll end up disappointed. If the future makes you scared or anxious it's just another reason that backs up my point. Be who you want to be now, forget about what repercussions that will make on you in 5, 10, 20 years because inevitably you'll be a different you by then with different goals and dreams!

Until next time! xx

Loving my body!

Hello!

Today's post is going to be a little bit overdone I feel yet I can completely understand why. Each and every girl on this planet will struggle to grasp the concept of weight and body shapes at some stage in their life. For me that stage finished very very recently, like in the last 3 months recently after having the trouble since I was 10/11 years old. Right now I weigh in at 71.4 kilos at a height of 176 cm (or 5'10), so it's clear to me that I'm not at all a 'skinny' or 'small' girl, and i'm completely okay with it. I can confirm that yes I've got slightly bigger than average boobies and quite a plump bum yet (thankfully) paired with quite a flat tummy and pinched in waist. I used to believe that I had gotten the worst of the family traits, whilst my cousin had gotten the best (with a small waist, average sized boobies and a normal stomach). That was until I started to accept myself more, I thank the universe that I got my aunt's flat stomach and my granny's height and my great grandma's curves, because it's what I now love most. 

Surprising that was the first step in me losing weight. For years I had tried to lessen my figure and even out the bumps and lumps to a more manageable size. I died to look like a runway model or somebody worthy for the cover page on a magazine. Yet during this period of crazy dieting and exercise I loss hardly anything at all because I was pushing my body to its limits causing me to crash and give in to laziness and cravings and then without rest starting up something else claiming that 'it just wasn't the right regime for me'. I was right of course, I just didn't take on the meaning of it until later on.

In the first 2 months of accepting my body I decided that switching my focus to staying healthy and maintaing my current body weight was going to be my new goal. After having set myself so many goals and standards previous it had become a habit to follow them to the best of my ability, what made a difference was that I stopped making the end result impossible. I took up little tricks of the trade like fidgeting in class or whenever I was sitting at the computer, and keeping a more relaxed diet letting myself have a donut or a chocolate if I felt like it for a snack whilst making certain that my main meals were organic and fresh. 

The most shocking change however has occurred in the last month were I have been constantly dropping of half of a kilo almost every day which is utterly incredible and extremely exciting for me. I think it's because I am now aware of what my body wants and when. If I feel like a salad I'll have a salad, if that salad is a chocolate bar well that works too. I've also found a way to ENJOY exercise. Yes  I am bloody well aware that I said ENJOY! People try music and stuff to distract them whilst they are running or working out etc, yet that has never been enough to motivate me. Instead I grab my little sister and we walk around until we get to a hill and have a race to the top, or I go for a walk with my friend who lives down the road and we have a good ol' chat. I have even started to do 'blogilate's' workouts on youtube (which you should all check out). 

(I am fully aware that i'm no dietician etc etc so this really is my personal story of how I've come to terms with my own body and what has helped me.)

Until next time! xx

Feeling Icky!

Hello!

Over the past week, I've been dreadfully ill with a very unwelcome stomach bug. My younger sister, Lily (age 11), caught something from someone in the school ground I'm assuming and being the loving big sister I am I appointed myself the role of making her feel much better. This included making numerous cups of lemon tea, giving out belly rubs before bedtime, and a great deal of cuddles. However my efforts were slashed as I was unaware how contagious this bug really was seeing as two days later I came down with it myself. 

Although I was unhappy at myself for catching the bug I was consoled by the fact that Lily was only sick for 24 hours. With the knowledge that it would be over soon I took a day off school to rest up and get myself feeling better. Until I woke up the following day feeling even more dreadful than the first! It's now been three days off school and I haven't improved in the slightest!

Due to this and many other cases of prolonged illness I've come to the conclusion that my immune system is practically non-existent. This theory was then confirmed by my local GP telling me that I have an unnaturally insufficient amount of cells that fight these bugs off and the ones I've got don't do a very good job either! Surprise, surprise! What's even weirder is that when I catch a sickness from somebody it can actually appear to be a totally different bug just because it affects me so terribly! 

After spending so long wrapped up in my bed and missing out on the final days of my schooling experience (seeing as I graduate in 3 weeks) I felt the need to rant and rave to anyone who'll listen to me. Just be glad that I don't have your phone number because I've been calling and texting all my contacts looking for a little support an comfort (which has been gratefully received I might add)!

Until next time! xx

Write My Life?

Hello!

Quite recently I received the last assignment I'm ever going to do in my high school years. Luckily for me it's an English written task! Easy as pie, I know! To make things even better I discovered that it's a bloody autobiography, I mean come on right how much simpler do you want to get? 

WRONG!

To my dismay this assignment is so much harder than I expected it to be. It's forced me to reflect on my entire existence, nit picking out specific moments that will convey who I am as a person and what I have to show for. Trust me whilst it seems like so uncomplicated,  it's actually a very (very) cringe worthy task! How on earth am I meant to sum up a perspective of me in 1,200 words. To recollect my most treasured memories and the choices that have made me who I am. To make a future prediction of where I'm going to go with my life and what successes I will come by. It's dauntingly impossible!

It's also made me come to realize however how much I've actually involved myself in without taking any notice. Turns out over the 17 year lifetime I've had so far, almost all of my most notable memories consist of me when I was most interested in the arts. Ranging from my brilliant performance as Sleeping Beauty in kindergarten to being apart of a performing arts group on the main stage in Disneyland only 6 months ago. However these memories to others may appear that I love to act/sing/dance and simply be on the stage when I'm actually much more interested in living in the story. 

That I figured is what makes writing so appealing to me. Sure I love being a part of the arts, don't get me wrong, but my heart has always been so invested in the story of it, so much so that it's what I want to do with my life. Maybe someday I'll be writing the school plays or even screenwriting in Hollywood itself but I do know that the arts have always helped me through tough times, dragging me into a story other than my own. 

Until next time! xx

Joelle Hadjia | Girl Crush

Hello!

If anyone has a been watching Australia's X Factor of late your sure to know that the stunning Joelle was voted off recently. I was surprised at the fact that I was absolutely devastated even though I don't regularly watch the show but rather have a sneak peak now and again. When questioning why I seemed so heartbroken that Joelle was leaving I discovered that she is indeed my latest girl crush. 

With a killer voice, striking features and undeniable determination I s'pose it was so easy to find myself drawn to her allure. The outfits, glamour and spunk she showed on the show also happen to make her my fashion style icon this month as well. My favorite look however was displayed on her final night on the show.....

It's easy to see why I love this powerful woman so much. Hopefully I've infected you with that love too...

Until next time! xx

The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight

At only 215 pages this book is an absolute whiz to get though, I read it literally in two nights! But don’t be dismayed by its size because even though it’s short it’s beautiful. Jennifer E Smith has outdone herself on this one. With Hadley and Oliver meeting completely under chance at airport and are surprising seated next to each other for the 7 hour flight from JFK to Heathrow it’s a girls typical dream and personally it reminded me of my own little airport encounter a couple of months ago, so I was particularly touched. Uncomplicated romance at its finest with clever character development and the cheekiness of Oliver and the wondering mind of Hadley (which I think anybody at all could relate to) it’s a book you can easily settle into whether you’re an experienced reader or not. I guess I’d recommend an age of probably like 14 and onwards until possibly 30? But age isn’t really a matter when reading this book I think it’s relatable to all ages and both girls and boys can enjoy this if you go into with an open mind – don’t judge the cheesiness of some of the circumstances and you will fall in love just like I did, its guaranteed. And I suppose I’ll end with my favourite lines from the novel itself:

“What are you really studying?” 

 He leans back to look at her. 

“The statistical probability of love at first sight.”